Sunday, April 22, 2007

My daddy...

Yesterday marked the 2-year anniversary since my dad passed away. It had been weighing on my mind all week. I was dreading the day, knowing that I would probably be a wreck and just wanna lay in bed and do nothing but cry. But actually, it didn't even hit me until about 7 last night. Oddly enough, I got up and did my cleaning, got dinner in the crock pot, went and played some basketball with Bri and the kids...all before noon. (For anyone who knows me, this is certainly a record.)

See, I'm not much of a morning person and usually don't really motivate until 10:30 or 11 on a weekend! I like my chill time! But for some bizarre reason, I found myself right up out of bed doing laundry, scrubbing the bathroom, kitchen, windows, etc. I just wanted to get everything out of the way, so I could actually enjoy the rest of the day. After playing basketball, I was dying for a deli that's what we had. I sat on the porch with my next door neighbor and we talked and were swinging away for a good hour. I laid down and took a cat nap late in the afternoon and then got up and finished dinner. Roast, mashed potatoes and green beens...all of which were wonderful. I chilled with Bri for a while until he took the kids to his parents house for the night. Once he got home, we played Party Poker for about 45 minutes, and we called it a day.

I never cried! Not one tear! And still today, I have not cried. I'm actually proud of myself for this! Instead of hiding under my covers crying and refusing to face the day....I lived and actually enjoyed my day! This is a major accomplishment!!!

While I miss my dad so very much I couldn't even put it into words...I know that he's okay. He's spending eternity with the woman he loved more than anything in this world! His life was never right, since the day that my mom was taken from him and now he has her back. He isn't in pain, he doesn't have high blood pressure, diabetes, his legs aren't swollen...he doesn't have to take the strongest pain meds to mask the pain that was caused by his cancer. He doesn't have to sit in the middle of a livingroom, with us around while he uses the restroom...or carry oxygen tanks. I'm glad for that! I'm happy for him!

I miss him so very much...but know that he really is where he belongs and there will be a day when I can see him again!

RIP Daddy!!! I love you!!!


Saturday, April 07, 2007

Good feelin...

It doesn't get any better than just chillin' out after a day of utter chaos! I'm so very tired right now, and know that if I laid down, I would just be done...out like a light. But I really don't feel like doing that. Just wanna be alone with my thoughts, for the moment.

The past few weeks have been a blur....with a sewer backup and my youngest having some major issues. It hasn't been pleasant, but I truly believe that the worst of it is over.
Seems that there is a select bunch, eight (to be exact), that are picking on my son at school. They have made him so miserable that he's been spending his lunches sulking in rooms by himself and pretty much not communicating with anyone. He just totally shut down. Several times, I've almost wished that he would have just knocked their blocks off, to let them know that he's not just gonna sit around and take it...that he's actually had enough! (Now I know that you all might be thinking...'wth is that loser mom saying'...but I just can't help it. Ty shouldn't be the one getting in trouble/being totally sad over this.)

We finally got a few of the teachers, principal, Tyler and myself all together to come up with a school/behavior plan. Hopefully this will serve to meet all of our needs and he can resume just being a kid and being happy when going to school!! Without getting sad or mad!

I am all set for Easter and am so glad that I decided to go to Peanutt's house to color eggs last night, instead of waiting until today. Since the kids no longer believe in such a thing as the Easter Bunny...I let them make their own basket this time around. They also made one for Bri's kids. They did a really great job. If my camera worked correctly, and I could actually dump my pics on here...I'd share! But I guess you will just have to take my word for it.

Off to my sister's tomorrow for dinner! I went and made the potatoes today, so that all she'll have to do is put them in the oven in the morning! I still have devilled eggs and banana pudding to make, but that won't be nothing, to finish up in the morning.

Well, I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday, whatever you might be up to! Hope the Easter Bunny brings many wonderful delights!!!